ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
