She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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