you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
