don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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