Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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