I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
