Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
