You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
We had sex on a dog bed..
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
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