she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
