i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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