it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
