I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
