I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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