Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
