the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
A bitchslap is in order.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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