A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
