I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
