Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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