Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I seem to have left my pride at pride
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
