Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Randomize