The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
