For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
there is puke in my bra ... again
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