do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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