I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I don't deserve a penis
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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