shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
