cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Randomize
