I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
