I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
The air taste purple.
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