We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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