If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize