Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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