nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
