do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Randomize
