it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
