i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
