Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
