he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
