PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
