bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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