Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
