I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
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