Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
