I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
