I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
He is an equal opportunity slut.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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