we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
