I bet he comes in French.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Randomize
