They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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