Define "chronic" masturbator.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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