Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
either way he was missing a nipple.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
