let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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